I have been a TERRIBLY neglectful blogger as of recently. I talked such a big game about saving money in May… which I did by the way! Forgive me for not letting you know how it went until June! Just a quick update here, I figured I was spending close to $100/month prior to May on coffee alone, never mind meals out. I was relatively diligent about making coffee ahead of time, keeping it in the fridge and doing up the “home brew” every morning before work. And because I’m a super nerd I also got in the habit of making coffee cubes, like ice cubes but better, when they melt it’s just MORE COFFEE! Who doesn’t love that?! At any rate, without being scientific I believe my experiment was a success, they say it takes 30 days to change a habit and my daily stop at Starbucks is no longer part of my routine.
Since I did so much cooking at home I do have a couple of super fantastic (in my opinion) recipes to share, I made some Salmon with Mango Salsa the other night that was so good I almost proposed to myself! But I have had some more important things on my mind lately so the recipes can wait.
I am fortunate enough to have a really amazing family and group of friends that will answer a text a 2:00am, listen to me vent, suggest a frozen yogurt date when I’m feeling lonely and install A/C units at my Grandmother’s house (extra points for that one). Lately it seems like many of us have been working through some big challenges both positive and negative. Changes in careers, relationships, growing families and while change is great it’s not always easy. What I’m starting to understand, maybe I’m just becoming a bit wiser, is that no matter what you’re going through you can absolutely determine how it affects your happiness by how you react to what you’re faced with. And sometimes without even realizing it, our own “grace under pressure” inspires others to take on their own challenges. It’s the struggle that make you stronger and is often the catalyst for something amazing, not only for you but for the people around you. For me one friends struggle and incredible strength combined with another’s passion created something that years later would change my life forever. Maybe I’m getting a little “kumbaya, it was destined to be, let’s all hold hands and sing” on you. But when I actually stopped to think where I have come from to where I am it’s pretty amazing how just the right things seemed to have happened at just the right time.
Two years ago I took a leap of faith, leaving my job in a place I loved and is still very close to my heart. It was a difficult decision but the best thing for me. It allowed me new opportunities, the chance to learn a new business, time to discover a whole new side of myself and the opportunity to get healthy again. I used to hate and I mean HATE any type of public speaking, even in front of my staff I would sometimes get nervous, never mind strangers. Over the last year and a half it’s become a regular part of my job and ya know what, it’s not so bad. Last week, I traveled to New York to speak at an event. Prior to my presentation pretty much everything that could go wrong did, I found myself with no power point or fancy electronics, lots more time on the schedule to fill than originally planned and a really painful blister from my heels ;-) I fell back on skills I learned from the job I thought would kill me… I tossed my “plans” out the window and I made it work with what I had. After I was done a woman from the audience came up to me and said “I just wanted to thank you, your presentation was great. And honey, you could talk the paint off the side of a barn!” I did wonder at first, is that actually a compliment? Later, that afternoon sitting in the airport I got a message from my boss that she’d gotten an e-mail saying how terrific my presentation had been earlier that day. It has taken me some time to realize but I know now staying in that place, not my “work” necessarily, but the place I was in mentally, it would have been impossible to change. I’ve always felt a sense of failure when I think back on where I was just a few years ago. That I was under too much pressure, the stress was overwhelming, that I didn’t have what it took and I quit. It was as hard to leave as it would have been to stay, I worked my rump off and I would do it again because it pushed me to a place where I was forced to change. I was forced to take a chance, that let me to the next place and new people, and then… and then… and then, you get it. Truth is, I didn’t quit, I knew when to say when and the things I learned then have come back to me when I’ve needed them most.
I ran into an old friend recently who commented on how happy I seemed, and she’s right I am happy. But I think it’s more than that, I think I’m grateful. For the life I’ve built and for those who have helped me build it and while I may not have all the things I want RIGHT NOW. I have an abundance of wonderful things to be grateful for every day. If it weren’t for the tough stuff, I wouldn’t appreciate the good things nearly as much and I’m a better person for having experienced them. As for those things I’ve been feeling desperate over lately, they’ll come, in time and I have a feeling will be better than anything I’ve ever imagined.
